随笔·摘录 65 · 弗朗西斯·培根

For raising and appeasing anger in another; it is done chiefly by choosing of times, when men are frowardest and worst disposed, to incense them. Again, by gathering (as was touched before) all that you can find out, to aggravate the contempt. And the two remedies are by the contraries. The former to take good times, when first to relate to a man an angry business; for the first impression is much; and the other is, to sever, as much as may be, the construction of the injury from the point of contempt; imputing it to misunderstanding, fear, passion, or what you will.

出处： https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/575
定位：Excerpt 65 · 核对日期：2026-10-19 · 核验：短摘录

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要挑起别人的怒气，主要靠挑准时机：趁人最烦躁、心情最坏的时候去激他；再把能搜罗到的轻视证据都堆上去，加重他被看不起的感觉。要平息怒气，办法正好相反：一是选好时机，趁人心情平稳时再谈那件惹火的事，因为第一印象很要紧；二是尽量把伤害和轻视分开，把对方的举动解释成误会、害怕、一时冲动之类，别往“他瞧不起我”上引。

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培根《随笔》论怒气，讲如何操纵和安抚他人情绪，带有实用主义色彩。

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下次要跟人谈一件容易起火的事，你会挑什么时机、怎样解释对方的动机？

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